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Posted by Rowena on November 18, 2002 at 04:27:21:
In Reply to: Re: to Rowena..one more thing posted by Rowena on November 18, 2002 at 01:22:43:
Hello again Chelsea, I had to go out, so I didn't have an opportunity to post some suggestions on how to encourage your baby to learn to self settle. There are a couple of approaches you could use to achieve this, but one way I find helpful (and gentle) for a very young baby of your son's age is the following. To encourage your baby to self settle your ultimate aim would be to be able to place him in his crib awake and for him to fall asleep unaided. Unfortunately this approach will not work if you prefer to sleep with your baby, because lying with your baby can also become a sleep association. (Not that I am at all against sleeping with a baby, I think it's lovely, but if you do, your baby will also want to sleep with you during the day as well and risks becoming overtired if you can't manage to do this). Anyway onto the suggestions. Rather than try to achieve this goal staight away (which would result in much crying on your baby's part) you can ease towards this goal in stages. How fast you achieve the ultimate goal depends on how fast you can progress though each stage. However I would suggest that you don't try to rush. Each stage will take about 1 - 3 days to achieve. Stage 1. You would continue to hold him as he falls asleep but while you are doing this you would also pat his thigh at the same time. Stage 2. When you feel he's familiar with the patting you would look at holding him (and patting) until he is in a drowsy state, and then gently place him in his crib while he's still awake. You would then continue to pat him to sleep while he is in his crib. If at any time you felt it was necessary, you would pick him up again hold and pat until he was again in a drowsy state and try again. You may need to do this a number of times. Stage 3. Now you will be aiming to place him into his cot while he's awake but would continue to pat him off to sleep in his crib. Stage 4. Once you feel he's quite happy to go into his crib awake, you would then only pat him until he is in a drowsy state and try to leave him to do the rest by himself. You would stay with him watching how he responds, if he looks like crying again you would quickly recommence patting until he was drowsy again. Stage 5. Over time you would try to stop patting sooner and sooner allowing him to settle himself from a more wakeful state. To encourage him to sleep for longer naps. At around the 20 minute mark you would watch him sleeping, when you see him stirring you would settle him according to which stage you were currently at. This method depends on consistency and patience. If you do different things each time he falls alseep he will not understand what you are trying to teach him. Much patience is require because it will take around 10 days to progress through these steps, but how fast you progress would depend on how he responds and how you are feeling, there is no rush. As I mentioned there are other ways to encourage a baby to self settle. The more effective ones do involve a little crying but you may like to try this gentle approach first. I find this approach does not work as well for older babies over 4 months. They are much more knowing and are not as easily fooled by this little ploy to change their sleep behavior. Anyway good luck, I hope this information helps.
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