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Controversial question regarding spanking

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Posted by Christy on September 06, 2003 at 01:20:36:

Hi, I have a 3-year-old boy and 4-year-old daughter whom receive a lot of love and attention daily and have tons of toys. I am feeling like a complete failure because they don't listen to a word I say, scream and throw tantrums for everything. My husband and I can never go out to dinner, the store, or anywhere without them throwing huge trantrums. The doctor says they are perfectly normal. If we are at a store, they want to run around everywhere and if I tell them no they scream and throw tantrums. If I put them in their stroller or shopping cart, they stand up and try to get out. If I tell them to sit down, they scream, even hit me, etc. My husband and I are not strict parents, so I really don't know what we are doing wrong. My husband and I are beginning to have arguments now because they are so out of control. He sometimes gets stressed out and then raises his voice at them. I then get upset with him because I think he shouldn't raise his voice, but then again they don't listen to either of us no matter what. No matter what I do. I have tried rewarding them for good behavior. I have tried everything. There are times when I feel like maybe I need to spank them when nothing helps. I have never spanked them, but I am feeling stressed out every day. If I even tell my daughter she needs to hold my h and when we cross the street, she throws a fit even for things that are for her own safety.

Sorry if I am rambling, but I would appreciate some advice. Thank you.

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