Posted by Rowena on September 06, 2003 at 05:15:15:
In Reply to: Controversial question regarding spanking posted by Christy on September 06, 2003 at 01:20:36:
I don't believe in spanking a child because I think it sends the child confusing messages. As a parent I am sure you would not be happy if your children hit each other or hit you, so they will not understand why it's OK for you (or their daddy) to hit them. Spanking a child sends the message that it's OK to hit someone when you're feeling angry or if you're bigger than they are.
As a mother I know how frustrating it can be to manage defiant and even destructive behavior and I will not claim that I have never smacked my children. On the rare occassions when I did spank one of my children (which was more out of my own frustration) all it achieved was to make the situation worse and make me feel bad. I found using Time-out a much more effective means of behavior management long term.
No doubt your doctor is right, chances are the behavior your children display is perfectly normal. You may find a large selection of books on behavior management that you could borrow from your local library that could be helpful. From these, you may learn new ways to manage your children's misbehavior or the books may reassure you that you are doing a good job already and this is simply a phase your children are passing through.
All the best