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Posted by Elizabeth on November 14, 2003 at 02:29:53:

In Reply to: This worries me. posted by Steve on November 13, 2003 at 22:47:47:

According to many child psychologists and pediatricians, it is not true that a child will associate the bed as just a place of punishment and not a place to sleep. A playpen like you say would be a good place too if they can't climb out of it of course. My daughters used to climb out. Many psychologists recommend a crib, playpen, or room because they are the safest places for time-outs. Also, a child under 3 usually will not stay in a chair so a chair is ineffective.

Like I mentioned, it may sound like harsh discipline, but it seemed to work for me. It is harsh if a parent does not meet their needs in other ways and are not very loving. I am extremely loving and affectionate with my kids, they also have everything, maybe even spoiled rotten. I don't yell at my kids or spank them. This is the toughest form of discipline that I use which has worked. Sometimes I wish I could be a bit more firm and direct with my kids. It just doesn't seem to come out of me no matter how hard I try. Many of my friends who are psychologists have actually told me that parents need to be firmer when the kids are very young because if you are not now, then as they get older they are going to be used to the parents not being firm enough that they will just run all over you and then you won't be able to control them as teenagers.

My parents were very loving but firm with all 3 of us and we were spanked on rare occasions. We are all very close as a family and have never given my parents any problems. I never smoked or drank, not even tried it, neither did my brother and sister; we lived with them until we got married, etc. I now thank them because they were firm because who knows how I would have turned out if they wouldn't have been that way. I had many friends in high school where their parents weren't firm at all and they became losers.


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